Patience is a virtue. So says a 70-year-old woman who, after 44 years of dating her teen sweetheart, will finally exchange vows.
|||Patience is a virtue. So says a 70-year-old grandmother who, after 44 years of dating her teenage sweetheart, will finally exchange vows with him today.
An elated Qondeni Ndlovu said she could not wait to finally change her surname to that of her fiancé, Njabulo Nkosi, when the two get traditionally married at her Umbumbulo home.
“I always knew that he would marry me,” said Ndlovu, smiling coyly.
Recalling their early years, Ndlovu said the two lovebirds met in Dr Pixley KaSeme (West) Street in 1969. They immediately hit it off and have been dating ever since.
“I knew from the get-go that he was the man for me and would be the father of my children,” she said.
The couple had six children but three have since died.
During their 44-year courtship the couple have never stayed together.
Although they saw each other at the weekends, Ndlovu said she and Nkosi, 84, were against cohabiting.
“Yes, we had children but my mother always told me that I shouldn’t stay with a man until I was married to him.”
Visibly excited about moving in with Nkosi at his Nquthu homestead, Ndlovu said she was looking forward to her wifely duties.
“I might be old, but as a new makoti (wife) I have to conduct myself in a particular manner and I know that the in-laws expect me to cater to their every need and that of my husband’s,” she said, beaming.
Speaking from Nquthu, Nkosi said he couldn’t wait to “begin” his life with his bride.
“I’m old in age but I’m definitely new at this marriage thing,” he said.
The lobola was paid to their children.
“We could have easily decided to move in together without me having to pay lobola for her, but I respect and observe our tradition,” he said, adding that he paid all 11 cows as stipulated by Zulu tradition.
What he loved most about his soon-to-be bride was the respect she had shown him throughout the years they had been together.
“There’s nothing as alluring as a woman who respects you as the head of the house.”
Finalising the details for her traditional wedding yesterday, Ndlovu said the past week had been hectic, but she was excited about exchanging gifts with her in-laws. “If someone had told me that planning a wedding was this stressful, maybe I would have thought twice about agreeing to marry Nkosi,” she joked.
Advising young women to be patient in their relationships, Ndlovu said the key to remaining happy in a union was to always respect your partner and not force the issue of marriage. “Marriage is a gift,” she said. “It’s not for everyone and it doesn’t have a cut-off age. But if it’s meant for you then it will come. Just be patient.”
The couple will have their white wedding in December. - Independent On Saturday